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Sirius Black

[ website | that 70's hogwarts ]
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Hm... [10 Aug 2002|11:24pm]
[ mood | uncomfortable ]


[Private]

A lot has been going through my mind lately. So much that when I try to think through everything, I end up getting frustrated with myself and my emotions. It's to the point to where I don't know what I'm doing anymore.

Remus and Clarice are really close now - hell, for all I know, they're probably dating. I should be happy for them. I want to be happy for them. But I'm not. I don't know if I should be calling this jealousy or overprotection. When I see them together, it drives me insane. They look so happy - it's like looking at another James and Lily.

Peter is so great, though. I guess you could say that we're dating, even if no one else knows about it. I'm slightly afraid that we're moving a little too fast. I mean, I really, really like Peter - but then I'm getting all of these mixed emotions from Remy. Both are so different, yet almost exactly the same. Their mock-innocence, shyness, sincerity. I'm drawn to it.

Peter spent the night last night, again. It felt really good to sleep next to someone - cuddle, hold their hand, listen to them breathe. I was in such a heaven. I hope he stays tonight, too... I don't think I could go back to sleeping in an empty bed.

[/Private]


Sirius
2 paws | touch me

Ehh. [20 Jul 2002|10:54pm]
[ mood | thoughtful ]


[Slytherin-block]

Full moon night went alright, I guess. We made it to the Shrieking Shack and back okay. I think we should leave a little earlier next time, though - just in case.

Remy's transformation was relatively normal, although still painful for him. His voice is really hoarse at the moment, more then usual. He howled a lot this moon - I'm not exactly sure why.

[/Slytherin-block]


No one ever updates anymore. The only entries I've seen lately are from the Slytherin trash. I guess everyone's been having too much fun to have any time for this stuff.


[Private]

Peter and I have been growing closer, surprisingly. Remus seems to be spending most of his time with Clarice, and James with Lily. I guess because Peter and I feel somewhat left out, we've bonded on a higher level.

He's really quite something. I haven't really noticed how much he's grown, as a person, this last year. He's still the same candy-loving, little boy Peter - but there's also this other side of him that is so intense. We have the most interesting conversations.

[/Private]


Sirius
touch me

Whew. [18 Jul 2002|12:56am]
[ mood | busy ]


Lily has been here for a week or so, now. James is so utterly happy. Lily is the new waitress at The Three Broomsticks. Oh, how I we love to rag on her during work hours.


[Slytherin-block]

Full moon is on the rise. It should be about friday, if I'm not mistaken. We're trying to figure out the best way to get in to the Shrieking Shack without being seen by the locals. If we can't find any other way, then I think we might have to sneak on to the Hogwarts grounds, then in to the Shreiking Shack.

Yes, that would be the perfect plan, but then we'd have to stay in the shack 'till saturday afternoon, so Remus can regain his strength to make the journey back Hogsmead - unless I find some way to "carry" him.

[/Slytherin-block]


In other news, there is apparently more Slytherin scum in our midts. How... interesting it shall be to listen to her... musings. Ew.

I have to run off to The Three Broomsticks now. Lily's working the graveyard shift, and since Peter and I don't work tomorrow, we've decided that we're going to play security and keep an eye out for her.


Sirius
2 paws | touch me

Summer! [07 Jul 2002|11:54pm]
[ mood | cheerful ]


Yes, I know it's been a while since summer started (around a month), but who cares? I, like everyone else, was sent to Hogsmead to get a job. Oh, but I have no reason to be complaining at all - I work at Zonko's!

I'm having a lot of fun. Lily should be arriving and starting her job soon. I think Clarice has been a little frazzled, 'cause she's been the only girl, you know? I mean... well... she's basically been my target for practical jokes. Eh, sorry, Clarice. It's all in fun and games, right?

Hog's Head hotel is so awesome. The innkeeper said he'd watch us, but he really doesn't care what we do - as long as we don't break anything or get in his hair. Mine and Remus' rooms are right accross from each other, and James and Peter's rooms are down the hall a ways.

Well, I have to work tomorrow. I think I should crash now.


Sirius
4 paws | touch me

I smell like bleach. [25 May 2002|11:51pm]
[ mood | sore ]


Muggle chemicals are good for nothing more then making you smell musky and gross (not to mention the stiffness in your joints, and clammy skin).

I smell like bleach. I spent the whole day in the laundry room with the House Elves, bleaching stains off of bed sheets.


[Slytherin-block]

I got caught when I sneaked up to the shrieking shack to see Remy after he transformed. The nurse walked in just as I covered his shaking body with the blanket that I had brought up for him. She flipped.

[/Slytherin-block]


It's dangerous, she said. I could have died, she said. Do I look that stupid to you? Nevermind - don't answer that.

Anyway, I had to explain myself to Dumbledore. He understood that I was worried, so he didn't expel me - but still needed to give me detention for roaming the castle grounds that early in the morning.

I'm very tired. I ache. I really need to just... curl up with my pillow right now. Loneliness isn't the best status in the world.


Sirius
5 paws | touch me

I just needed time to cool off... [22 May 2002|07:40pm]
[ mood | calm ]


I think I'm alright now. I'm just going to stand in the side-lines and let Remy do his thing. I know he needs to do this for himself, but if those assholes do anything hurtful to him in any way, I'm going to step in and take care of them myself.

It's just that every time they say something distasteful against one of my friends, especially what they continuously say about Remy, it makes me very upset. These guys are my life. I love them more then my own family.

I have homework to finish and such, so I guess I'm going now.


Sirius
touch me

Oh, great. Really. [17 May 2002|12:23am]
[ mood | cynical ]


I would like to inform everyone that this bloody git now has a journal.

That, and I want to clearly state that he's only on my friend's list so I can keep an eye on him. If he tries anything... ::Growls::

That is all. Go back to sleep.


Sirius
4 paws | touch me

... *Huff.* [17 May 2002|12:08am]
[ mood | annoyed ]


Remus is running off with Clarice in the middle of the bloody night. Somehow, I don't think he understands how much the Slytherin's are out for our blood.

Anything could happen to him while he's off gallivanting through the corridors at this time. He's supposed to be the sensible one. What the hell happened?!

Looks like I'm not going to get any sleep tonight. Like it matters, anyway. I'm going to go see if James or Peter are up.


Sirius
2 paws | touch me

Jesus Christ. [13 May 2002|12:01am]
[ mood | enraged ]


I can't believe Remus is seriously thinking about 'handling' this situation with Malfoy and Summers. So many things could happen if they confront them, I don't even know where to start.

I don't want Remus or Peter getting hurt. Maybe I'm just being paranoid and overprotective - since I'm so used to being the one that sticks up for his friends. The one that gets into the fights. The one that handles all of the dirty work. What if something happens to them?

The last thing we need is for us all to be on tight strings. We're lucky enough to have Remus here under the circumstances that he's under, and you know how Malfoy is. I have no doubt in my mind that he knows just where Remy goes every full moon - and if Malfoy knows, then you can bet your ass that Summers, Snape, and that whore of a girlfriend Narcissa knows also.

And what about James? The Gryffindor team is already suffering because I've been suspended from playing for two weeks. If James gets into it, then he'll be suspended too, and we'll have no chance of winning the house cup this year.

Fuck. I just wish there was some way I could kill those Slytherin assholes without anyone finding out.


Sirius
2 paws | touch me

Ugh. [12 May 2002|12:47am]
[ mood | enraged ]


I have detention for the rest of the month. I... er... got into a fist-fight with Snape. I guess we got eachother pretty even, by the look of it, but that doesn't matter. We were already sent to the hospital wing.

I probably would have ignored him and walked away if he hadn't said some... not nice things about Remus. I wasn't thinking - I snapped. Don't get me wrong, I don't regret hitting him, but now I'm on trial-bases. One more major screw-up, and I'm out. Gone.

I'm going for a walk. I need to think about... things.


Sirius
3 paws | touch me

Stupid Peeves. [03 May 2002|10:54pm]
[ mood | tired ]


I had to do detention today. On my way to the little boy's room (during class), Peeves set off some explosives, and disappeared. Naturally, I got caught 'red handed', or something. One day someone's going to hurt him real bad, and he'll be sorry. Hopefully that person will be me.


[Slytherin-block]

It was full moon a few nights ago - Remus asked me to stay (in animagus form) with him in the Shreiking Shack, so I did. He's been asking me to stay with him a lot lately. Somehow I think his transformations are getting more painful for him - if that's even possible - because the look of intense pain on his face seemss to be getting worse. I haven't expressed how much it hurts me to watch him transform. I know he needs me there, just for his own peace of mind and comforting, even if he can't remember what happened.

[/Slytherin-block]


*Sigh* Well, it's been a long day. I'm going to head up to bed now. Goodnight.


Sirius
touch me

First entry. La de da. [30 Apr 2002|10:16pm]
[ mood | bored ]


Peter told me about this thing, and insisted that I make one for myself. Since I'm easily amused, I did... I think he's still trying to convince Remus and James into getting one too.

I don't have much to talk about - frankly, I think I'm pretty boring. But, who knows, maybe some of you muggles will find me at least somewhat amusing.

Ahh, well, I have nothing left to say. I think I'll go harass Severus s'more before he goes up to bed. *Grin*


Sirius
7 paws | touch me

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